Monday morning, sparrow’s wossname. Farouk from Maidstone calls Nick Ferrari on LBC Radio to rant about Israel’s war of self-defence in Gaza.

Diving under the duvet is tempting, of course. However, with Ferrari being the most captivating thing on the radio aside from Ken Bruce, I tune in with cautious attention, though my hearing isn’t as sharp as it once was.

Young Nicholas maintains his characteristic politeness. We agree to hold differing views but not let it divide us. (Acknowledgment to the great Graham Gouldman: The Things We Do for Love.)

Then again, who gives a monkey’s what Farouk from Maidstone thinks about the Hamas hellhole in Gaza?

For what it’s worth, my vision of ‘From the river to the sea’ sees Israel’s borders stretching up to the northern tip of the Piccadilly Line, ideally.

What else would you expect from a founder member of Spurs Against The Nazis, back in 1981?

Therefore, my frustration is hardly surprising over Surkeir’s pitiful and politically motivated ‘recognition’ of a Hamas/Palestinian state, conveniently announced right after The Donald departed on Air Force One.

Sir Keir Starmer issues a statement on the Government’s recognition of Palestine. Richard Littlejohn questions why the British PM is grandstanding about a conflict that doesn’t concern us.

Trash accumulates on the streets of strike-hit Birmingham. Back when Littlejohn hosted call-ins on LBC like Ferrari, discussions focused on parking and waste collection, not the situation in Gaza.

Starmer is an absolute disgrace, a complete and utter lawyer, as I believe someone once described him. Modesty forbids.

(How do you end up a Gooner from Guildford, when everyone else in Surrey supports Man United?) Beside the point, actually.

Why the hell is the Prime Minister of Great Britain showboating about a war which has nothing to do with us?

Yeah, OK, he needs to placate his far-Left lunatics on the back (and front) benches. But, seriously? His missus is Jewish, for Chrissakes.

Which brings us back to Farouk from Maidstone. Be fair, we’re not talking Darling Buds Of May here.

When I first knew of Nick Ferrari, his dad, Dan, ran a news agency called Ferrari of Dartford, just down the road from Maidstone. Great man, great agency, great journalist.

Anyway, I’ve never heard of Farouk from Maidstone, or Farouk from Dartford, or wherever.

The Palestinian flag flies in Hammersmith, West London. Richard’s version of ‘From the river to the sea’ involves Israel’s borders extending to northern end of the Piccadilly Line 

These days, though, Farouk is par for the course. Nothing personal, guv, but this is one step beyond.

Kent used to be Farage Country. These days it’s Farouk Country.

Now before the usual suspects start bouncing up and down, yelling their boilerplate bollo about RAY-CISM, let me make it Waterford crystal this has got nothing to do with race or religion or anything else.

But back in the days (not ‘back in the day’) when I did Ferrari-style phone-ins on LBC, the calls from Farouk, and anyone else, were about Kent council’s cock-ups, not the Gaza Strip. Parking, bin collections, stuff like that.

This occurred to me on Friday night when I was getting outside of haddock, chips and mushy peas in London’s best chippie, Chippers, in Cockfosters, opposite the Tube station.

There was a poster on a lamp-post, announcing the introduction of a 20mph speed limit across the borough – ‘safer streets’, something like that…

In other words – lots of lovely fines all round.

My daughter said her next-door neighbour, a lady of a certain age, had just been banned from driving for doing 27mph in a street which was 30mph until last week.

We’re in Nero and fiddles territory here.

No one in Chippers was talking about Gaza. Not even Farouk from Friern Barnet.

The country is going to hell in a handcart and our ‘leaders’ are, er, indulging themselves over Gaza instead of concentrating on what matters back home.

And now, on line one, it’s Farouk from Maidstone…