For years, the disappearance of college student Bethany Decker in 2011 baffled authorities—until a courageous stranger stepped forward with a chilling tale of her own.

Investigators discovered that both women had encountered the same man, but only one had survived to recount her experience. This revelation is detailed in the Nov. 5 episode of Oxygen’s Dateline: Secrets Uncovered.

Bethany Decker’s Complex Love Life

Although Bayles and Bethany’s mom Kim Nelson tried calling her for days, their attempts to reach her were unsuccessful. It was strange because, at the time, Nelson was caring full-time for Bethany’s young toddler son Kai and it was unlike Bethany not to check in on her son, who she shared with her husband, Emile Decker.

As a member of the National Guard, Emile was often deployed for long stints and the distance had taken its toll on the young marriage. At the time she disappeared, Bethany and Emile were separated and she was living with a man she met at work, Ronald Roldan.

Bethany was also three months pregnant, presumably with Roldan’s baby.

Although it was unlike Bethany to go long without contacting her family, they initially were reassured because she had been sending messages to her sister and friends through social media. Yet, as the weeks passed and there was still no sign of Bethany, the family reported her missing to the Loudoun County Sheriff’s Office.

Bayles accompanied a deputy to Bethany’s apartment. Inside they found the apartment had been cleaned out, although Bethany had been in the process of moving out when she disappeared. Inside a closet, they found Bethany’s small purse and her car keys. Her car—which Bayles said was completely covered in dust—still sat in the parking lot. 

According to Loudoun County Sheriff’s Detective Mark Bush, the trunk was “completely packed” with Bethany’s belongings. Underneath all of the clothing, they found a computer and three cell phones that had been left behind.

Bush noted the circumstances were unusual, but there were still no clear signs to indicate what happened to Bethany.

“There’s no obvious blood stains, there’s no obvious bullet holes in the walls,” he said. “There’s no weapon that’s found inside of the apartment.”

Authorities searched the areas surrounding the apartment complex, but found no sign of Bethany. 

Picture of Violent Relationship Emerges

As they dug deeper into Bethany’s past, investigators set out to learn more about the men in her life. They tracked down Roldan at his mother’s house.

“He’s very engaging,” Bush recalled. “He’s painting the entire relationship with a rosy picture.”

But those who knew Bethany had a different take on the relationship. They described Roldan—who Bethany met while they worked together at a restaurant—as controlling.

As Nelson explained, “He had to know where she was and I had heard a time that he had installed some software on her cell phone to be able to track her.”

On another occasion, Nelson said baby Kai had bruising above his eyes after Roldan watched him, injuries Roldan explained away by saying Kai had fallen from a chair. Kai later moved in with Nelson full-time.

Others described Bethany as being the victim of abuse herself.

“She couldn’t get out of it,” Bayles remembered. “So she was in a relationship with somebody that was abusing her physically and emotionally and threatening her family.”

Roldan told investigators he saw Bethany in the early morning hours of Jan. 29 after she’d returned home from her grandmother’s house. He claimed she went to bed, woke up in the morning and then left to return to her grandmother’s house, but she never came back to the apartment.

He added that he had “no idea” where she was. 

Investigators also spoke with Emile. He had been on leave from the military at the time and was trying to reconcile with Bethany. He’d even taken her to Hawaii the week before she disappeared in an attempt to get her away from Roldan. He’d also been at Bayles’ home on Jan. 28 and told investigators he followed her in his own car when she left.

“They stop at a local gas station, he has a conversation with Bethany, he fills her tire up,” Bush explained, adding he “tried to convince her not to continue going back to Ashburn.” 

But Bethany couldn’t be convinced and continued on the trip on her own.

Ronald Roldan Has Violent Altercation With New Girlfriend

Without any definitive evidence about what happened to Bethany the case stalled, until investigators got a call two years later from authorities in Pinehurst, North Carolina. 

Roldan’s new girlfriend Vickey Willoughby had been hospitalized after being beaten and shot in a brutal struggle with Roldan. Willoughby later lost an eye as a result of the violence and had to undergo surgery, but she still had the courage to recount the horrific ordeal to investigators. She told authorities that Roldan turned on her after she refused to have sex with him.

“He was punching me. Punching me in the head,” she recalled from her hospital bed. “Just kept hitting me over and over.”

Willoughby grabbed a revolver she’d hidden under the couch and shot Roldan twice in the chest, but he managed to get the gun away from her and shot her in the arm and her head.

She fled the house, bloody and battered, to get help from a nearby neighbor.

After being treated for his own injuries, Roldan was charged with assault with a deadly weapon. 

Willoughby told investigators that she was terrified of Roldan, in part, because of comments he allegedly made about Decker.

As Bush explained, “His statement to her was, ‘I’ve made one girlfriend disappear, I can do it again.’”

“He’s very much that sociopath,” Bush said, “who feels no remorse.”

To delve into more compelling mysteries, watch Dateline: Secrets Uncovered Wednesdays at 8/7c on Oxygen.