Kim Kardashian has been hinting at her interest in remarrying, but according to an exclusive source from In Touch, she’s still dealing with the emotional scars from her three previous marriages. She is now focused on moving forward and starting a new chapter in her romantic life.

An insider reveals, “Kim tries to learn from her past mistakes as life lessons, but she still finds it quite embarrassing to have gone through three divorces.” At 44, Kim first entered into marriage at 19 with music producer Damon Thomas, who was 10 years older. Their marriage didn’t last, ending in divorce just over three years later, in 2003. Her next marriage was the short-lived union with Kris Humphries. They married following a six-month romance in 2011, only to separate 72 days later, with Kim citing “irreconcilable differences” for the split.

Kim’s marriage to Kanye West turned out to be her longest. After separating from NBA player Kris, she and Kanye, now 47, tied the knot in May 2014, following the birth of their eldest child, North, in June 2013. Together, they have four children, including daughter Chicago, 7, and sons Saint, 9, and Psalm, 5. However, after Kanye’s public unraveling and bizarre behavior, Kim filed for divorce in February 2021.

The source notes that, even though Kim’s now focused on her children primarily, “She can’t help but worry that she’ll never find ‘the one’ for life, which is very sad because that’s all she wanted growing up, to meet her person and stay with them until the end.” 

“But it hasn’t worked out that way, and what’s even harder is how public her failures have been, so there’s this layer of embarrassment, too.” 

Despite the very public implosion of her relationships, Kim revealed on a recent episode of The Kardashians discussed marrying again with sister Khloé Kardashian, saying, “I wonder what my next ring shape will be? For my last and final hurrah.” The thought experiment came after she alluded to “secretly” dating someone back in January, though the mystery man’s identity has yet to be revealed. Still, the source notes that even though, “She knows people are judging her,” Kim is willing to keep trying until she finds her life partner. 

“She really did believe in all three of her marriages, but after having three failures, it takes real courage to try again,” the insider explains. “Kanye, especially, left a lasting scar and she’s still dealing with the aftermath.” As In Touch previously reported, Kim even has a “no-Kanye talk” rule set up in her house to avoid any extra trauma to the children as Ye continues acting out in public.

“Even though he gave her four wonderful kids, the marriage was a nightmare in the end. Still, she’s a romantic at heart and there’s no way she can give up on the idea of love and commitment, but there’s no denying she still has some damage to work through.”