I was a healthy 34-year-old – then everything changed with one shock diagnosis
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I did a lot of things wrong when I was diagnosed with cancer. One of the things I wish I could change about my time in early treatment would be to try and access mental health support sooner. In fairness, I had never had cancer before. I had never had to confront the very real possibility of dying. I had never had to have conversations with loved ones about possibly not seeing them again, or what I might want my funeral to look like. I had never had to speak to my partner about wills or do not resuscitate orders.

These are all things I had to do without any training, without the right tools. Fortunately for me, later in my treatment I would have access to mental health support, thanks to a clinical psychologist. I was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma in 2019, when I was 34 years old. I was the fittest I had been in years, my diet was healthy, and I was a keen runner. The speed with which this all changed (amongst other things obviously) was scary. I was having chemo within weeks of my diagnosis.

So much was happening so quickly that trying to mentally process it all was too overwhelming – better just to power on through as much of the treatment as I could.

This was not sustainable and led to an inevitable falling apart following a stem cell transplant. I was dealing with (or not dealing with) disease, treatment, pain and isolation. Isolation which was exacerbated by the COVID outbreak. Due to a weakened immune system and the danger posed by COVID, I have been effectively shielding since 2020.

I needed professional help to navigate all of this and I was lucky enough that I was offered support by a clinical psychologist embedded in the wider medical team at my hospital. I later learned that this was a post which only existed because of funding provided by the Anthony Nolan charity.

It is difficult to express how much impact this help had on me. I was blessed with a brilliant support network through my partner (we married in isolation during my treatment in 2020), family and friends.

But being able to speak to a professional is different. They had the experience of people in similar situations and could give me the right tools to navigate some of the darkest times in my life.

This support needs to be available to all those who are going through cancer treatment and its huge consequences, not just those who happen to live near the right hospital. The physical treatment I went through cost tens if not hundreds of thousands of pounds, and without mental health support I genuinely do not know if I would be here today.

I know that my physical recovery has gone hand in hand with my mental recovery, so why are we only committing to doing half the job for patients and leaving them to fend for themselves with the mental aspects of illness?

Help should also have been available for my partner. She was supporting me, while also trying to keep our lives going – it is only due to her ongoing strength that we came through the worst of it.

Mental health support needs to be embedded as standard care into the treatment we offer to all cancer patients.

This is why I’m backing the Daily Express’s Cancer Care campaign to ensure patients receive mental healthcare both during and after their treatment.

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