“I’m sorry to inform you that you have prostate cancer.” It’s 11:47 a.m. on a Tuesday in October 2021, and I’ve just been told I have prostate cancer. The moment feels utterly surreal. “What—me?” echoes a voice inside my head. I glance around, half-expecting the doctor to be addressing someone else. Surely, this can’t be about me. Cancer is something that happens to other people, right? Yet, here I am, facing this reality. “So, what comes next?” I ask.

The doctor presents me with two options, but his words don’t fully register. I’m handed a booklet filled with numbers and letters that seem unintelligible. The nurses kindly decipher it for me: the situation is serious, but I have choices. I need to make a decision in the coming weeks. As I exit the room, clutching a stack of booklets and papers, I can’t help but think, did that really just happen?

This wasn’t part of my life plan. When you read that one in eight men (and one in four Black men) will face a prostate cancer diagnosis, you never imagine you’ll be that statistic.

I meet my wife at a café, where she’s waiting for me—COVID restrictions meant she couldn’t join me for the appointment. I share the news with her, and we begin to discuss what this means for us.

My mind is a whirlwind of emotions. How do you begin to process all of this? Coping with cancer involves more than just dealing with the medical condition. It’s about navigating your emotional reactions, understanding the implications of treatment, and managing the logistics of receiving care. And crucially, it involves communication.

My wife has been a pillar of strength. I also found solace in talking to my friend Andy, who, by chance, received the same diagnosis just two months earlier. My daughter, a nurse, offered invaluable insights, which helped me consider my options and plan for the upcoming months. This network of support has been vital in maintaining my mental equilibrium.

So, in February 2022, I started to explore the possibility of creating a support group for men with prostate cancer; two months later, we had our first meeting. Within 18 months, we had to move to a bigger venue to accommodate increasing numbers at our meetings.

Because you don’t have to deal with it on your own. Tackle Prostate Cancer supports more than 150 Prostate Cancer Support Groups across the UK. Their aim is to offer the ongoing emotional support people with prostate cancer need, whether they are preparing for cancer treatment, going through a course of treatment or recovering from one, and getting on with their life.

All prostate cancer patients ideally should have access to mental health support. This belief is why I lead a support group in Huddersfield, which meets twice a month. Everyone who attends has the opportunity to share what is currently happening in their life. Sometimes people are sad, sometimes angry, but in talking about it, they have the chance to process and release those feelings.

Most importantly, they are sharing this with people who have lived through treatment and can share their experiences – people just like them.

Humour and positive mental health are crucial ways of dealing with prostate cancer. We run monthly Pilates sessions with a local Pilates teacher; we organise monthly walks in the local area, and wild swimming features occasionally. Many of the group support a “5K Your Way” ParkRun every month.

Our partners’ group, which started last year, recognises that cancer affects more than the person diagnosed. Through a close relationship with our local hospital’s urology department, we are able to let men know about our group when they are actually diagnosed, so that they can access support fairly swiftly.

Seven of our group have recently trained as peer coaches – specifically focused on helping men who need to make a choice about their treatment pathway, ensuring they have all the information in a supportive but neutral way.

This initiative officially launched this month, thanks to Movember and Tackle Prostate Cancer. I am through my initial treatment. If it comes back, I will deal with it.

Our support group does not let cancer define us. We share stories, we laugh, we get sad sometimes, but we deal with it. Above all, we talk about it. And when we do, things are a little easier.

All cancer patients deserve to have this kind of support, and this is why I’m backing the Daily Express’s Cancer Care campaign. All cancer patients must have access to mental health support both during and after treatment.