Despite believing it was necessary, Jessica still grapples with feelings of guilt and shame about her choice, questioning whether it was truly justifiable.

A chance reunion

“I was petrified of encountering him. I struggled with severe social anxiety and avoided being in public due to the fear of an encounter,” she confessed.

“I saw someone who seemed sad and lost … just a bloke at the pub, having a beer.”

“It was difficult, but it was almost a relief because he wasn’t the monster I had imagined,” Kathryn said.

‘I would have been five feet under’

She says that the relationship with her family deteriorated and contact with them ceased.

Jennifer says her relationship with several family members deteriorated when she came out as trans.

She says that, although coming out had the consequences it did, she needed to do it.

“If I had not have done it, I would have been five feet under,” Jennifer said.

Mending severed ties

“And I love all my three boys and grandchildren. And not being able to have contact with them breaks my heart … The same with my wife.”

However, she says that maintaining strong boundaries with her dad is critical for her. They occasionally text and see each other once or twice a year.

“I think we still do love each other. And it’s not so scary anymore.”

Living with regret

She decided it was necessary to take out another intervention order, which was granted.

Jessica and her late mother. Source: Supplied

Last year, Jessica’s mother died from a combination of mixed drug toxicity and alcohol. Jessica feels a sense of responsibility and has unanswered questions.