The cookbook for when you’re DRUNK: Recipes that are safe to make after you’ve had one too many

We’ve all at one point in our lives (or more) stumbled through the front door and embarked on a mission to indulge in a mouth-watering post-night feast.

But considering one in four fires start in the kitchen and half of all fatal house fires involve alcohol or drugs, firefighters have concocted a comical cookbook for those who have had a few too many.

You’re Cooked offers inebriated revellers the opportunity to satisfy their late night cravings without the risk of burning their house down.

Created by firefighters in New Zealand, the 117-page cookbook features chapters including You’re Toasted, You’re Smashed, You’re Wasted, You’re Canned and You’re Twisted. 

For those wondering what’s on the menu, You’re Cooked features recipes including an air-fried chicken nugget sandwich, microwaved spicy beans on toast, sushi cones or even suggests skipping out any preparation at all by stealing your housemate’s ‘Forbidden Lasagna’. 

Firefighters in New Zealand have created a recipe book targeting those who are too intoxicated to be trusted near an oven

The hilariously crafted recipe book includes a ‘Chugget Sandwich’ – a safely air-fried version of a chicken nugget sandwich

Party-goers can then wash their safely prepared meals down with a glass of ‘Blue Soberaid’ – which includes water, honey, multivitamins among other ingredients to stave off a hangover.

You’re Cooked describes itself as ‘a cookbook for all those at-home chefs under the influence’. 

It adds: ‘A buffet of recipes that don’t require a stove top, helping satiate the late-night cravings without burning the house down.’

A video to promote the book shows visibly intoxicated chefs testing out the recipes – with one struggling to butter their bread, while another unable to prevent his food spilling from his mouth into a bowl.

Other recipes deemed to be safe include ‘You-done Udon’ for noodles made with a kettle as well as ‘Not-fried rice’ prepared in the microwave.

The cookbook guides late-night chefs with comical instructions. For ‘Uncanned Beans’, it tells revellers to ‘release the beans from their tin prison, and tip them into a microwave-safe bowl’.

It adds: ‘To spice up your world, add a pinch of cumin, curry powder, and chilli powder to the beans.

Alternative recipes include a microwave-made spicy beans on toast (left) and a kettle-prepared noodle sandwich (right)

‘Nuke the beans for 2 minutes, stirring the beans halfway (cold beans = bad time).

‘Smear the toast with butter, drop the beans on the greasy bread mattress, and munch.’

Despite the obvious lighthearted nature of You’re Cooked, firefighters insist the book has a serious message for those tempted to rustle up a feast after a night out on the town. 

‘Distracted while cooking is the leading cause of house fires. Stay off the stove if you’re drunk or high,’ the campaign warns.