“Introducing ‘Trump Fragrances’: The scents are named ‘Victory 45-47’ and embody the essence of Winning, Strength, and Success for both men and women,” he announced on Monday night. “Grab a bottle for yourself and don’t forget to pick up one for your loved ones too.”

“Enjoy, have fun, and keep winning!” the president added 

Critics on the left are outraged, not because they dislike the scent of success, but due to the product’s launch timing. Now, Trump is promoting a fragrance while he holds the presidential office.

Did Trump actually test any fragrance samples to craft the perfect scent of triumph? Certainly not. You might label me as harsh, but I can’t help but find it amusing to imagine countless critics who, upon discovering Victory 45-47, might be venting their frustration or yelling into a pillow. In reality, Trump isn’t directly “selling” these items. The fragrance is marketed by 45Footwear LLC under a licensing deal.

“Our fragrances are curated to capture the essence of success and determination, with each scent symbolizing victory and strength,” the website reads. “Spray on Fight, Fight, Fight, and feel the immediate power!”

I think it’s hilarious. 

Others who have resided in the White House sell merch. Since leaving the White House, the Clintons have sold influence. George Bush paints portraits. I can’t find any listings that offer his seemingly paint-by-numbers portraits for sale. Maybe he gives them away. He should. But you can buy prints if you are so inclined. 

And then, there are the Obamas. Barack and Michelle. Barack sells himself. If he could bottle himself, he would. The power couple cut a deal in 2018 with Netflix worth an undisclosed amount. It was almost certainly for tens of millions of dollars. The Obama production company is called “Higher Ground.” What has “Higher Ground” produced? I don’t know. Michelle branched out on her own to produce and appear on her own podcast. She often appears with her brother. I’ve seen clips. If she’s selling “Michelle,” it doesn’t seem to be working. Since it premiered, her ratings have tanked, dropping about 80 percent. But Michelle remains on brand. She bashes everything, including her marriage. Remember when she said that she was finally proud of her country? In 2008, right before her husband was elected President, Michelle said that for the first time in her adult life, she was proud of her country.  

“People in this country are ready for change and hungry for a different kind of politics and … for the first time in my adult life I am proud of my country because it feels like hope is finally making a comeback.”

Yikes.  

Now, eight years after leaving the White House, Michelle is selling her own brand of sports drink called “PLEZi.” She is a part-owner of the company that sells the drink. 

Michelle hocking a drink for your 4thhttps://t.co/rEQeSjqJG0

— Jim Thompson (@JimmySportToons) July 4, 2025

You’ll notice that she never mentions the reason for the 4th. Something like “Our nation’s birthday,”…or something. I don’t know, it’s like talking about Christmas and mentioning everything but Christ. I never thought Michelle was proud of her country, so this seems kind of on brand. I think I’ll pass on trundling down to the local market to pick up a bottle of PLEZi.

Today I think I’ll celebrate America’s birthday with a hot dog or two, a bottle of beer or two, and say: 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMERICA! While I raise a non-PLEZi beverage. 

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