The Worst Things Saints Have Ever Done

The Worst Things Saints Have Ever Done

St. Augustine might be a respected church father, and the idea of reading his “Confessions” might seem so boring it’d be preferable to go get a few teeth pulled, but his confessions are, well, something on a whole other level. The New Yorker says that it was this respected, revered saint who “invented sex,” and while that might be a bit of an exaggeration, it’s not by much.

Augustine wrote about some pretty lurid affairs, and while things like having a child out of wedlock might not be too surprising to our 21st-century sensibilities, there’s no denying that he treated the women he professed to love pretty badly. Aleteia says that after almost two decades of sampling all the fleshy pleasures the world had to offer, he settled down with a woman who bore his son. He records his son’s name — Adeodatus — but never hers. They never married, and when he refused on multiple occasions, she left.

It was enough to make Augustine wonder if there was something to this marriage thing after all, but before he could marry the younger women who had been promised to him, he ended up hooking up with still more women. (He was in his 30s, and he needed to wait until she was old enough to legally marry. So, there’s another yikes.) It was so bad that even his mother intervened and asked him to please, please, please stop seducing married women.

Source: This post first appeared on

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You May Also Like

18-Year-Old Accused of Leaving Newborn in Toilet After Taking Online Abortion Drug, Police Say

Inset: Syeisha Johnson and Elijah Speight (Durham County Jail). Background: The Durham,…

Man With 47 Convictions Admits 30+ Bike Thefts, Police Say

Staff report GAINESVILLE, Fla. – Chadrick Rodell Smith Sr., 54, was arrested…

Police Say Man Said It Felt Great to Kill Mother in Her Home

A police cruiser and crime scene tape are seen outside Cedar River…

Lawn Service Worker Arrested in Equipment Thefts From Gainesville Landscapers and City Crews

Staff report GAINESVILLE, Fla. – Andre Lejuan Sessions, 37, was arrested yesterday…

Son Who Played Video Games 60 Hours a Week Admits Pulling Assault Rifle Trigger on Mom in House Dispute

Insets: Beau Lieurance (Maricopa County Sheriff’s Office/KSAZ/YouTube). Background: The Arizona home where…

Police: Mother Told Dad to Say Goodbye, Slit 2 Kids’ Throats

Inset: Kailey Erhart (Mandan Police Department). Background: Burleigh Morton Detention Center in…

Sheriff: Man Posed as Roommate After Killing Him, Burying Body in Shallow Backyard Grave

Inset, from left: Cris L. Jones and Daniel Joslin (SBSO). Background: Aerial…

Woman Decapitated Beside Fiancé in 75 MPH Pontoon Crash, Lawsuit Says

Left inset: Magdalena Jablonska (Ryan-Parke Funeral Home). Right inset: Richard Stevenson (McHenry…