A cryptic Instagram message arrived on Bonnie Lou Gower’s account in 2024, carrying just seven words—and the weight of a disturbing history that stretched back decades.
“I hear we have something in common,” the direct message said.
The sender was no mystery to Gower. It was the woman her former husband had abducted and sexually assaulted 22 years earlier after taking her from a South Carolina front yard. She had been just 15 at the time.
Gower’s ex-husband was Richard Marc Evonitz, a serial killer conclusively tied to the murders of three teenage girls in Virginia during the 1990s. Kara Robinson Chamberlain, now 39, was the victim who survived his attack—and whose account helped investigators locate Evonitz before he died by suicide at age 38.
“When I got the message from her, I was kind of floored,” Gower told Our News Outlet. “I wasn’t sure what to do with it, but I thought, ‘She’s pretty brave and is reaching out to me, so I should talk to her and just see where this goes.’”
Gower had come across Chamberlain’s social media pages before. There, Chamberlain spoke openly about victims’ experiences and true-crime cases—content that had occasionally made Gower consider contacting her first.
“But what do you talk about?” Gower, now 55, remembered wondering. “And why would she want to talk to me? I didn’t want to intrude on her life or bring something to her that she didn’t want to deal with.”
For her part, Chamberlain had never blamed Gower for Evonitz’s crimes. Despite Gower’s marriage to the killer, Chamberlain had thought about her often.
Kara Robinson Chamberlain reached out to the former wife of the man who kidnapped and sexually assaulted her 22 years earlier
Bonnie Lou Gower had publicly identified her first husband as serial killer Richard Marc Evonitz
Evonitz, pictured with Gower, was conclusively linked to the killings of three teenage girls in Virginia during the 1990s
“I very much viewed her as a victim in a way as well, someone who had no idea who this person was that she was married to,” Chamberlain said. “I viewed her not as anyone who held any culpability, but simply as someone who had been part of this journey.”
Gower answered the message, and the two quickly found a connection. Their first conversation stretched for hours by phone, eventually leading to an extraordinary partnership focused on examining other crimes that Evonitz may have committed.
Their investigation is the focus of The Serial Killer Connection, a three-part series that premiered Wednesday night on Investigation Discovery. The remaining two episodes are scheduled to air on Wednesdays, with the full series also available to stream on HBO Max.
For Chamberlain, the project represents another chapter in her lifelong effort to uncover the complete truth about the man who abducted her.
“I just feel so very strongly that he was responsible for more than we know,” she said. “I feel this in my bones.”
Evonitz’s crimes became known in June 2002. On June 24, Chamberlain was watering flowers outside a friend’s home in Columbia, South Carolina, when the 38-year-old pulled up in a car, pressed a gun against her neck and forced her inside.
He took her to his apartment, restrained her to a bed with handcuffs and sexually assaulted her repeatedly over approximately 18 hours. Chamberlain eventually freed herself by using her teeth to open the handcuffs, then removing a restraint from her leg. While Evonitz slept, she quietly made her way out.
After flagging down a passing vehicle, Chamberlain was driven to a police station. The details she provided led authorities to Evonitz’s residence, but he had already escaped. Investigators later traced him to Sarasota, Florida, where he died by suicide on June 27 as police moved in.
Chamberlain escaped from Evonitz and gave police the information they needed to track him down before he died by suicide
Chamberlain was kidnapped by Evonitz from her friend’s front yard in 2002
Around the same time, there was a knock at the then 30-year-old Gower’s California home.
She had been married to Evonitz from 1988 to 1996 but in the six years that had passed since their separation, she had remarried and had children with her second husband.
Gower was baking a cake with her two young sons when the doorbell rang and FBI agents asked her to sit down.
They told her what happened to Chamberlain, and that her ex-husband was on the run.
‘I was shocked, I could not imagine that he would be capable of hurting anybody,’ she said. ‘It was very surreal, though, a lot of things went through my head.’
And soon there would be more to process. After Evonitz’s suicide, police found notes in his apartment in Richland County, South Carolina, indicating that he was responsible for more crimes.
Forensic evidence eventually tied him to the kidnapping, sexual assault and murder in Virginia of Sofia Silva, 16, in September 1996, and of sisters Kristin and Kati Lisk, aged 15 and 12, in May 1997.
Silva had been abducted and killed when Gower and Evonitz were still living together.
After Evonitz’s suicide, police found notes in his apartment indicating that he was responsible for more crimes, including the murder of Sofia Silva, 16, in September 1996
Forensic evidence eventually tied him to the kidnapping, sexual assault and murder of sisters Kristin and Kati Lisk, aged 15 and 12, in May 1997
Looking back today, Gower understands that she was a victim, too. She was 11 years old when she met Evonitz, who was 20 at the time. He was the older brother of a friend, and they started dating when she was 14; they married in August 1988, just a month after she turned 17.
She describes him as ‘charming’ and says she was smitten.
‘I was raised by a single mother and alone a lot, and was very naive [and] extremely trusting,’ she said. ‘Looking back, I was a perfect victim, in the sense that I was easily manipulated. I didn’t even realize I was being manipulated.’
Evonitz was in the Navy so the young couple moved around a lot, first to Portland, Maine, then to San Diego, California, before settling in Spotsylvania County, Virginia.
In The Serial Killer Connection, Gower recounts starting their married life and finding herself in a controlling relationship with Evonitz, who taunted her about her looks and her weight. Although there were red flags, it was not a physically abusive relationship.
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Over the years, Gower found a Polaroid photo of a teenage neighbor sunbathing, a trunk full of pornography and a workout video featuring a teenage girl. She also found Evonitz, who liked to bind her with handcuffs during sex even though it made her uncomfortable, wearing her underwear once.
When she raised concerns about the pornography or expressed unease about the bondage, he was dismissive and implied she was the one at fault.
‘He would always put it back on me that I was the one with the issue, that what he was doing was perfectly normal, that anything that you do within the realms of a married relationship, as long as it’s consensual, is fine,’ she told Our News Outlet.
Bonnie was married to Evonitz from 1988 to 1996 but she had since remarried and had children with her second husband when Chamberlain was kidnapped
Silva was abducted and killed when Bonnie and Evonitz were still living together
Nothing, she said, suggested he might be preying on young girls.
But on September 9, 1996, when Gower was in San Diego visiting her brother, 16-year-old Sofia Silva vanished as she drank a soda on her front porch in Spotsylvania.
Her body was found five weeks later. She had been asphyxiated and signs of sexual assault were present.
Police threw resources at the investigation but had few leads.
Gower remembers coming home from her trip around the time this was all happening. Evonitz was late to pick her up and was ‘kind of disheveled’ and in a bad mood. The shower curtain and a rug were missing from the master bathroom.
He told her he had slipped, grabbed the shower curtain and fallen on the rug, so he threw them both away.
Gower had no reason not to believe him but their relationship had been deteriorating, and she was worried about Evonitz’s mood swings. Deciding he was not the man she wanted to start a family with, she left later in 1996 and embarked on a new life.
Evonitz went on to kill two more girls – the Lisk sisters – in Spotsylvania the following year.
Gower was 11 years old when she first met Evonitz, who was 20 at the time
They started dating when she was 14; they married in August 1988, just a month after she turned 17
When Gower found out about her ex-husband’s gruesome double life five years later, she struggled to process the information. She had panic attacks and anxiety but was also busy raising a young family and tried to compartmentalize her feelings.
At a therapist’s suggestion, she started writing down her thoughts. Over the years, these entries turned into a book about her experience living with Evonitz, and in 2024 she decided to look for a publisher. Her son and his wife were both influencers and suggested using social media to draw attention to her situation.
She posted a TikTok video as part of the Put a Finger Down challenge when people tell their stories and see if others can relate. It became a viral sensation and now has nearly 40 million views.
One of those watching was Chamberlain.
In the intervening years, Chamberlain had forged a career in law enforcement, before having a family and focusing her efforts on victim advocacy. She drew on her personal and professional experience in her own podcast and in documentaries about other unsolved crimes.
When people pointed out Gower’s video, Chamberlain was intrigued and quickly got in touch with her unusual message.
‘I was like, “what do you say?” I have a touch of the dark humor and was like, “this is an absurd situation so I’m just going to send a kind of absurd message,”‘ she explained.
Evonitz was in the Navy so the young couple moved around a lot, first to Portland, Maine, then to San Diego, California, before settling in Spotsylvania County, Virginia
It was the conversation starter that she hoped it would be, and Chamberlain explained her drive to find out if Evonitz was responsible for more killings.
While on the run, Evonitz spoke to his sister on the phone and told her he had committed ‘more crimes than he can remember.’
But he has only been linked conclusively to the three Spotsylvania murders and Chamberlain’s abduction in South Carolina.
She felt as though Gower could have crucial pieces of the puzzle, and the idea for The Serial Killer Connection was born.
‘It worked really beautifully,’ said Chamberlain, ‘because Bonnie has so much information from that time that tells her story, but also tells his story.’
The Serial Killer Connection weaves Chamberlain and Gower’s narratives into their investigations as they look into unsolved crimes that Evonitz could be responsible for – from Portland to Spotsylvania.
The series includes shocking revelations and witness testimony about Evonitz’s potential links to other high profile unsolved murders in all three of the places he and Gower lived.
Chamberlain hopes that the show will prompt law enforcement agencies to investigate potentially linked cases and get relevant evidence into national databases.
Chamberlain forged a career in law enforcement before having a family and focusing her efforts on victim advocacy
Chamberlain teamed up with Bonnie for The Serial Killer Connection, which premiered on Investigation Discovery last week
‘My big goal is that we can find out what those cases are and I think that I will be fighting that fight for the rest of my life,’ she said.
And she thinks the unique connection that she and Bonnie share is bringing these cold cases to a wider audience.
‘When have you ever seen a family member of an offender and a victim come together and work together for a united cause? I just don’t think it’s something that’s been done,’ she said.
