Fractured Media Award Nominations: Supporting Crime, Opposing Health, and Mourning a Dog Before Charlie

It’s time to unveil new contenders for our dubious recognition of questionable journalism! As we acknowledge the unprofessional antics of the press, the frequent laziness, and the mockery they earn, we extend end-of-year nominations. To honor the tradition of thorough investigative reporting and diligent journalism, we’ve established The Golden Remington Awards. This prize pays homage to the era when dedicated reporters crafted their stories on robust typewriters.

We routinely collect some of the most flawed representations of news reporting, vying for the not-so-prestigious “victory” of our infamous Remmy Award. At year’s end, we celebrate these “achievements” by curating examples in various categories and carefully selecting the ones that deserve recognition.

Here are the latest nominees for The Remmys.

Distinguished Explanatory Reporting

When President Trump deployed National Guard troops to Washington D.C. to curtail crime, Lawrence provided what he considered definitive evidence suggesting this action was unnecessary.

He shared a segment from the film “Mr. Smith Goes To Washington.” To argue against Trump’s intervention in the nation’s capital, he cited a scene of Jimmy Stewart at Union Station, pointing out the absence of National Guardsmen patrolling the area, as explained in the video he shared.

In a fictional movie scene…from 1939.

And there you have it – ironclad proof that there is no crime in Washington, D.C.

Distinguished National Reporting 

In response to Cracker Barrel executives reversing their decision to change the company’s logo and redesign its restaurants, CNN offered a rather narrow viewpoint.

Despite widespread opposition from its customer base – including the Democratic Party – here was CNN declaring that the opposition was coming only from the right-wing.

Distinguished Cultural Commentary

In looking over the Jimmy Kimmel commentary, CNN’s media maven tried to sound insightful as he came up with a rather stark dose of obviousness. He proclaimed that the TV host was more popular than he had been one week earlier.

This is the opposite of a surprise, considering that Kimmel was receiving around-the-clock coverage for that week.

Distinguished Sports Reporting

The Mets announcer brought up the fact that Matt Shaw of the Chicago Cubs missed a game last week because he attended the funeral of Charlie Kirk. Shaw was actually a friend of Kirk, but that was not the only obliviousness from the play-by-play man. It was shown that previously Cohen missed a broadcast because his family was in mourning for the passing of the family dog.

Distinguished Local Reporting 

In a lengthy piece, the writer details just how unnecessary it was for President Trump to send those troops into the Capitol. She attempts to paint their presence as a comical tableau, all to underscore her claim that there is no crime problem in the area. Her lobbying effort is undercut by a curious source – Ashley Parker herself.

It was just months earlier that Parker detailed a list of the crimes that her family endured, but now that it is President Trump taking action, she needs to find the move to be ridiculous.

Distinguished Cultural Criticism

In a gripping segment covering the travails of singles these days, Audie Cornish detailed how many users are getting burnt out from using dating apps. We give you one guess who is to blame.

Somehow, President Trump and MAGA are to blame for the diminished prospects many women are experiencing.

The Gold Lame Cordouroy Pillow for Best Headlines (sponsored by the New York Post)

Distinguished Public Service

It is rather clear that the press is taking a stance of opposition to Robert Kennedy Jr. On “ABC This Week,” there was a panel discussion regarding some of the moves made recently by the director of the Health and Human Services agency, and there was quite a contradiction on display.

When discussing matters of public health, maybe having Chris Christie deliver the messaging is not the way to go?

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